What if...

I took a deep breath and dived into the icy cold water. first thing to pop in my mind, " i should have take a shower first, this water is freezing!" i came up for air and noticed all eyes on me, It didn't help much knowing that i was the only girl trying out for the swim competitions, and in a boys only school. the joy! In a moments decision i decided that i would swim the whole way with only that first gulp of air i took. It would be no big feat, I've done it several times during competitions and that was how i won. I started my strokes, and kept a mental checklist going. right hand, left. feet, working! i kept my strokes at an even pace, until halfway through i decided that i probably should hurry up if i wanted to keep up with my " no coming up for air" thing.

right hand, left, right hand, left.
wall.
finally, i never thought this pool would end.

I took in all the air i could and reached for the nearest towel handed to me.
my gym couch patted me on the back and whispered to me to hurry up and get dressed.
i ran to the guys locker room, and that was probably my best record at taking a shower and getting dressed. it was awkward enough being the only girl trying out in an all boys school, i could imagine how awkward it would be getting caught being in the guy's locker room. i got done, opened the door, looked around and sneaked out of there and ran to sit on the benches. i waited for my coach in anticipation and smiled when i saw her approaching...until i saw the look of disappointment on her face. i raised my eyebrows at her questioningly, " you should have come up for air!" was the first thing she said
"what!!" i exclaimed
" yah, the coach said you should have come up for air, so they're not taking you"
"that makes no sense, did you see how fast i went? that's supposed to be a good thing, not bad!"
"well sorry but now you'll know for next time"

there wasn't going to be any next time i thought in my hea. plus who needed a school that couldn't appreciate my " no coming up for breath technique"


but, what if i would have made it.

party in the masjid...ok noo, not really!

" you wanna go pray maghrib with us?
"yea sure ok, lemme go dress. it'll take a moment"

notice my dad only said we were gonna go pray and nothing further. any normal person, (such as i) puts on anything and goes. which was exactly what i did. i had my pjs some yellow socks, with my purple flats and i was ready to roll! apparently my dad forgot to tell me we were also going to be attending a dinner!!!

last time i was here and went to that masjid to pray it was only my family, only mine. like we almost had to make my 4 year old sister imam, only us. so imagine my shock to find half the community there, and that my dears was their first impression of me. lovely.

seriously though thinking about it, i was fine standing infront of God and praying in my not so best but i cared more about what people thought? in my defense though: God doesn't judge me according to what i wear, so HAH!

yahh, jokes still on me.

Why yes. I am pretty genius thank you very much!

My life is consumed by a vile thing which i call...schoolwork. thinking high school is tough? well you have seen nothing yet, your life is yet to be consumed and your soul sold to the devil. It all makes sense really, umm in a weird, twisted way!

so the other day i happened to be flying in a plane because that's just how i roll, you know the usual! and i was checking my email on the plane thousands of feet above the ground and it dawned on me how awesomely amazing that is. words of praise for my creator came out of my mouth. Who would have thought that it would be possible to be flying above the clouds, sending out emails and drinking sprite, all at the same time. I would have told you you were crazy! looking out the window, buildings looked like specks of light floating in the air and i was that much closer to the stars and the heavens. i know it makes no sense to believe that i was that much closer to God, and therefore my prayers would be heard better but seriously who in all that amazement could pass such an opportunity to be thankful for all they've lived and seen. words often fall short of describing emotion even though that was why words were created to begin with.

Now if i may be excused, I've got some Hobbes to catch up with. For reals i think that guy was genius but i also think I'm genius, so who am i to judge.





I swear i meant the other Hobbes, the dude who wrote Leviathan. but they're pretty genius too.