false alarm

I woke up to my sister yelling in my ear " guess what? guess what? the samples came and no one opened the door so we have to pick them up" still half asleep i got up and went to get confirmation from my mom. she confirmed it but for some reason i didn't believe that the clothing samples have finally arrived and that i could at last get a move on with my clothing business. " how do you know" i asked "7abebti, it's not like we're waiting for anything else" she told me. anyways aboki rye7 yegbhom.
turns out we were waiting for something else, my grandma's passport.

moral of the story : if your sister comes waking you up screaming, push her away and go back to sleep.

if you have no idea what the kebab i'm talking about you may continue sleeping as well.

you can't live with em but you can't live without em

couple of days ago my parents drove to Virginia to go pick up my grandma who's been staying with my uncle, and i was left here to defend myself with the little monsters. that's why i haven't really been blogging much. I was ultra super excited to see my grandma again but at the same time admit i was a little nervous. see when i was little and living in Egyptland my family and I were living with her and therefore i was her favorite, and unlike every other Arab who calls their grandmother "seto", " tetah" or " gedah" i called her " Amah" kinda slang for mom, all my uncles would come and call her "amah" and that's what i grew up knowing and i think part of calling her mom made her like me, but then we moved to the US of A and even though i was still her favorite when she came here the differences between generations and cultural upbringings and mindset began to show. During my graduation party, which was all girls i was told by her to go wear something on my skin when i wore my maxi sleeveless dress, i was told i should already know how to cook, and why was i not wearing abayas? When she came last night while sitting down eating dinner she asks if i had cut my hair, when i tell her yes she laughs telling me i was stupid to cut my hair, long hair is a crown on a woman's head, i laughed it off as well but i could tell she was kind of serious. don't get me wrong i love my grandma, she was the one that raised me, we joke around, and can have the best time in the world together. the differences between us and how we were raised are more noticeable then ever though!

Update: she just told me and my mom " i dunno why you and your daughter are wearing what you are wearing? why don't you and your daughter wear niqab?"

just so you know my mom dresses in wide abayas and long hijabs covering the chest, she goes more with netural colors

i on the other hand am usually wearing skirts with tunics and cardigans, sometimes maxi dresses or abayas, i'm very loud with my colors, so for the most part we wear proper hijab lol

2 ends of a spectrum

As a teenager everything seems so difficult. it feels as if everyone is against you. I'm not sure what my point is really or where i am heading with this, but i guess whatever your age is there will always be difficulties to face and looking back all the the things you thought were hard to face back then seem a joke now. my little sister who's 3 will get mad if you call her a little girl and she so wants to be a big girl. she'll try to put on my high heels, put some lipstick on her mouth and walk like she's on a catwalk! I'll look at her and in my mind I'm telling her to enjoy her age, there's no going back once you grow-up, you can only look back and remember. how i wish to go back to the simplicity of being 3 when my biggest challenge would be trying to not eat the spinach or the broccoli. but i can't really tell her all this, because at her age all i wanted was to be a big girl.

I Miss her

It's so sad to know that you're losing a friend and losing touch with them but can't really do anything about it. All the memories serve as just that, they're now something of the past. but what truly breaks my heart is when this is happening with your best friend, the one who ceased to be that and turned into a sister, a family member really. This is exactly what is happening to me. We went from living on the same street, to living 2 streets away, to about 10 minutes away, to 12 hours, and now about 3 days. we used to see each other everyday, even after i moved we used to talk almost everyday and now, barely talk at all. I'm probably the least person to know anything about her right now. ugh i hate feeling sappy and I'm probably leaning towards being cheesy but hey there's a chance of zero that she'll probably visit here so i can go on as i want. At the beginning i didn't realize how much we've really grown apart and I'm afraid to even think about it. What is even more sad is the way we used to say we'll go to the same university, be roommates, and probably end up living next door to each other, and now look at us; we're not likely to get any further than we already are. we used to feel disbelief at those who promised to be friends forever but left time to take its toll. maybe it's my fault, maybe its hers. I'll never really know until i talk to her.

I HATE FISHING!

Here's an embarrassing story that i have so far been good at keeping hidden, but as of now the blogger world will know all about my little mishap. so one day, our family and another family were on one of those detested fishing trips and for some reason i cannot remember i was walking alone in the woods, I've probably blocked out from the embarrassment. anyways, I'm walking and i hear rustling and since i was pretty close to where my family and the other family were fishing i figured " hey it's my brother, let me give him a good scare" so i started getting all excited and giggly and right when the person came around the corner i jumped out at them doing my Tarzan yell. only problem, it wasn't my brother. it was my dad's friend. i tried passing it off like i was sneezing or something, but alas, the damage was done.

That's not the only reason i hate fishing, i hate seeing anything being killed, even if its only a little fish. i get so sad seeing the little things stuck on the hook and fighting for air. really, who wants to see their dinner dying in front of them. problem is my dad and siblings see it as entertaining and get that thrill when they do catch one, and my dad views fishing time as "family bonding time" which means we all have to go, and which also translates into me and my mom sitting shooing away mosquitoes and trying to dodge the ant hole, while my dad and siblings stick worms into a fishing pole and throw it in the water waiting for the fish to bite, which is exactly what we did today!

A life story ( part 1)

She woke up with a startle. Her hands were sweaty and her heart was beating hard. She tried to adjust her eyes to the darkness around her and catch her breath at the same time. It was the third night in a row she had had this nightmare, or a bad omen as she would call it. She slid back under her cover trying to close out the nightmare from her mind. She did not want to think about it, but what was the use. She knew.

Someone close to her was going to die.

The sunlight streamed through the curtains and she winced as she got up. She had a killer headache and she felt that she was forgetting something. As her sister came in her room to wake her up and before she could yet at her for coming in without knocking, it all came back to her. The nightmare, the sweating, and the fear of knowing that someone close to her was going to die. It all came back to her and hit her with such force that she started tearing up. What if it was her sister?
Seeing that she was awake, sitting there with such a look of horror on her face, jasmine closed her mouth and knew to leave her sister alone when she was in a bad mood. She left the room quietly, not that her sister noticed; she was too preoccupied with her thoughts.

Katie walked in a daze throughout the day; the tension was too much. She wished the whole ordeal were over already. She silently cried out at her monstrosity. How could she even think that thought? She had to spend every moment she had with her friends and family, she did not want to regret those moments later. When she got home from school she gave her mom a big hug and held her for a couple of moments trying to remember and store everything about the moment. Her mom smiled gave her a big smile and jokingly asked if she wanted anything and what was up all of a sudden. Katie just smiled at her mom. “Would you like to go out for dinner?” she said, “just you, me, and jasmine, my treat.” “Ok now something is really wrong,” her mom joked with her again. “Just be ready at 5:00 mom” she called out as she got to her room.

to be continued....